Yesterday on The XY Code I said I have finally gotten past feeling my sexuality makes me, or my penis, a monster. And I explained that it took so long not because of my wife, but my own fears and beliefs.  Growing up in... The post Overcoming Sexual Fear

Do you need your wife more than she needs you? Or does she need you more than you need her? Which of you gains more from the marriage? Which of you would be worse off if the marriage ended? Of course, your answers are... The post Friday Flashback: How Rea

In a recent Doing Marriage Well post, my wonderful wife suggested that being faithful means doing what you should as well as not doing what you should not! Her example was: Certainly, I want to be faithful sexually to my sweetie (not cheat on... The post

Do you have a before snow list? It being the start of August here, we are thinking about what we need to get done outside before it snows. We might have till early November, but we could lose sight of the ground well before...The post Make a Before it

I mention in todays XY Code post that most women have a superior sense of smell. This little gender difference can cause problems in marriage. She complains about the trash because she smells it. He ignores her because he does not. She doesnt want...Th

Last week, I pointed to a study on how self-expansion can improve sex for a couple. Today I want to dig into that concept. Self-expansion theory says that when we spend time with people we like, we become more like them. Our relationships change... The po

Given the propensity of human traditions to multiply and block the truth, it is important for believers to be sure that their practice of church is built on the correct foundation. ~ Jon Zens Jon was talking about how one does church there, but...The

I suggested on Monday that you ask your wife what you could do that would speak love to her. And then be all about doing those things. But what if most of the things she suggested are a lot of work, or would cost... The post Making Her Feel Loved Even Whe

Our minds like to understand and categorise things, and we do this with people. We figure out who someone is, and put them in a box with a label. Then we move on, and assume they are still in the box, just as we... The post Is Your Wife Still in the Box Y

Last Monday, I suggested you tell your wife what you do to show her love, and ask her what she does to show you love. I also asked you to keep an eye out for her doing those things during the week. Were you... The post Learning How to Best Show Your Wife