Episode 11: Tell Me What You Really Think with Peter Axelson

Peter Axelson leads Garnet Consulting and has worked as an external consultant in training, coaching and organizational development for more than 35 years. Clients tell him that they bring him back because of his high standards for client service, his focus on behavioral change and business results and his very practical approach to helping people learn and grow. 

As I close out Season One, I wanted to take a look back and go a bit deeper on two important leadership themes that emerged from my previous guests: the stories we tell ourselves and asking for feedback.

In today’s episode we’re going to continue my conversation with Peter and talk about asking for feedback – the foundational tool for uncovering our blind spots, whether we are just starting out managing one person or especially as we advance in our career the feedback we receive usually declines just when we need it most. 

Before we dive into my conversation with Peter, let’s look back on a few episodes where my guests highlighted the importance of asking for feedback during their own leadership journey…

Kevin Halleran the EVP and CFO at Donahue Schriber

“I never realized how defensive I was and from there on out - I can't say I do it every time but it's certainly something I focus on; I've got to be willing to hear it, and not react. I’ve got to take what they say and I’ve got to digest it. And if I do that, I've taken time to reflect I've realized, there’s really truth to this. There’s something I've got to think about versus just giving them that gut reaction. If I'm defensive all the time and I don't let people give me feedback, they don't want to give it to me. They're saying, Oh yeah, everything's fine. How does that help me grow if I'm not getting the feedback?”

Kelly Jankowski is a Managing Director at MSL

“When you're open to feedback, people give you really good feedback. And there's a lot of different ways to be open. There's something to learn everywhere and especially as you get more senior and more established. I wake up some days and I'm like, today, I'm going to figure out what I needed to learn that I haven't yet.”

Marcel Botha is the Founder and CEO of 10XBeta

“They don't speak to investors that they don't like with feedback that they will only want to speak with people who understand their visionary message. And I think, with the exception of a few, most people fail if they can't quantify or receive feedback in a meaningful way. I have failed many times, because I didn't listen to feedback in a timely manner, or I was too excited about something that I thought was meaningful, but others didn't.”

Elliot Felix is the CEO & Founder of brightspot (which has just been acquired by Buro Happold)

“When we have a question, we don't stew over it internally. We get on the phone with a client and we figure it out with them. That's what has given us more certainty in this crazy time is acting on that instinct. So, we've been talking to our clients more, not less and learning from them and trying stuff out and getting feedback - this is helpful, this isn’t helpful, let's do more of this, less of this.”

Key Takeaways from this Episode:

· Asking for feedback uncovers blind spots we have no matter where we are in our career

· Asking for and receiving feedback contributes to healthy, trusting, respectful, collaborative relationships

· The importance of exploring why asking for feedback will be beneficial to you

· Don’t forget to focus on strengths – don’t just focus on areas for development

· Create your own feedback culture by consistently asking for feedback

· Be clear about what you want to know, ask open ended or specific questions which will elicit good feedback

· Safety is critical: we explore why safety is so important and how to successfully create safety

· The beer sign: do people think you really want feedback?

· There is no such thing as a wrong perception, you don’t have to agree with people’s perception, but you do have to be curious about how they got that perception

· Different people have different perceptions of the same behavior 

To learn more about my work in executive coaching, leadership development and team effectiveness check out my website, connect with me on LinkedIn or email me at winnie@winnifred.org.  

Reach out and tell me what was helpful about today’s episode or any suggestions you have for my show.

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I look forward to sharing another transformative conversation with you next week!

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