“When we perceive a man, we perceive him as a whole. His physical body, his intellect, his personality – it’s all tied into who he is as a person. So, while his body may be aging, he’s growing more independent, successful, and mature. Therefore, he's still attractive – perhaps even more so. It doesn’t matter that he’s got some wrinkles, because his body is healthily aligned with his being.”

Grace, the woman who wrote this about men observes the antithesis in the world concerning women. I'm not here to debate it, it is true. Period. I'll talk in future publishing about this.

While some people would argue that women are not seen differently, it doesn't negate that it is true for many and a lack of privilege presented a different worldview. To argue against another person's experience is foolish. We don't get to speak for all who share commonality with us.

I look to start a conversation that would begin "When we perceive a [wo]man, we perceive him her as a whole."

While there are many men who would readily vow to perceive women as her whole, we must not be naive and pretend that our culture does not, as a collective, see women in this way. The loud, bold, open, and exposed reality of how some men view women is violent and subtle. The violent side of things, the hate, the ridicule, the objectification, the lack of empathy, the blind-sided workload, and the emotional and physical abuse are easy to spot. The subtle side is often more demeaning and unconsciously active. This is true, even for our sisters in this world. Subtle defines what is often unnoticeable. And what is unnoticeable can often be deadly. The death of agency, death of liberty, death of identity, and death of self-worth are just a few outcomes of unseen misogyny and sexism. I hope to explain the identity-crippling, painful, and isolating abuses and the emotional terror they cause in future writings. 

Seeing something and how it affects others can't be unseen. Once you see certain things, especially systemic and cultural hatred of half the population, you can't put that back in the bottle and be considered human. We don't know who can and cannot see women in a true sense as human beings, persons, and equals. For the men who do, it is obvious that we do not control the dominant voice and it appears to me, that we aren't even on the airwaves.

For over twenty years I have been preparing to speak to this issue. I'm not speaking for women or even to women. No, mainly I am speaking about how many view women and how men who see and know the truth should be partners in this journey to right centuries of wrongs.

It is wrong.

That is not up for discussion.

Grace asks her readers to "Think of the most beautiful woman you know."

"I doubt you’re thinking about her boobs or butt. You’re probably thinking about her vibe, her energy, how she makes you feel when you’re around her, how she is healthily aligned with her being. She doesn’t try hard because she doesn’t have to. She is firm, grounded, strong. She is emotional, sensitive, compassionate. She is everything that makes a woman and more. She is not the sum of her parts. She is not a trend. She is a gestalt."

Society, culture, and everything that makes these things tick is responsible. So, because we comprise society, we are responsible for changing it.

My next book publishing will be the title of this essay, and if permitted, will reveal my life-long passion for this issue, my journey to seeing things as they are, and that the spiritual side of life and love demands such attention, reform, and relegation of both the bold and silent bias against our sisters.

In this speaking, our sisters do not need men to defend them, fight for them, or stand in their place. This is part of the problem. They have the agency and ability to do so. They need partnership as human beings to overcome a long-standing hatred that is so common it's nearly invisible. 

But they can see.