The Virtual Couch

The Virtual Couch


Yes, We're Talking New Year’s Resolutions (and Goals, and Kale) – But Stick with Me, It's Not What You Think!

December 28, 2023

Tony addresses why so many New Year’s resolutions don’t last and explores the concept of value-based goals and the importance of aligning them with personal values for the sake of authenticity and lasting change. He discusses the shortcomings of the SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound) goal-setting method. He plays clips from an interview with his friend Neal Hooper about their discoveries on incorporating Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) into the goal-setting process. Neal introduces the elements necessary for genuine progress and fulfillment - the 'why' and 'how' of making SMARTER goals. Drawing from the principles of ACT and illustrating through the story of the client “Jason’s” transformational journey, he emphasizes the significance of acceptance, committed action, and psychological flexibility. The episode also points out the need to view setbacks as opportunities for growth, not pitfalls, and illustrates the importance of flexibility in goal setting.


00:00 Introduction: The Struggle with Traditional Goal-Setting

01:27 Meet the Host: Tony Overbay and His Podcasts

03:11 The Problem with New Year's Resolutions

06:48 The SMART Goals Method: An Overview

08:21 Jason's Story: A Case Study in Goal Setting

09:27 The Limitations of SMART Goals: Jason's Experience

14:26 The Shift to Values-Driven Goals

15:00 Jason's Transformation: Embracing a Holistic Approach

22:27 Conclusion: The Power of Mindfulness and Acceptance in Goal Setting

23:01 Challenges and Old Habits

23:24 Acceptance and Compassion in Change

24:10 The Power of Small Victories

24:42 Aligning Goals with Personal Values

25:13 The Pitfalls of Yo-Yo Dieting

25:42 The Pushup Challenge: A Personal Journey

26:25 Embracing Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

27:27 The Power of Daily Commitment

29:56 The Importance of Why and How in Goal Setting

30:22 The Role of Shame in Goal Setting

30:56 The Problem with Traditional Goal Setting

31:19 The Importance of Perceived Value and Capability in Goals

34:36 The Power of Smarter Goals

41:58 The Misconception of Committed Action

43:25 The Role of Setbacks in Growth

44:14 Embracing Discomfort and Doubt

44:42 Conclusion: The Power of ACT Principles


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