Can you truly change your personality in ways that make your life feel fuller and more in line with who you want to be?

In this episode of Psychologists Off the Clock, Jill sits down with Olga Khazan, author of Me But Better, to explore that question in a way that feels relatable and inspiring. Olga shares her journey of becoming more outgoing and less anxious, mixing scientific insights with honest reflections on the challenges she faced, showing that real change is possible and something you can actively pursue.

They also explore the Big Five personality traits and how intentional shifts in your personality can boost your happiness and overall well-being. Olga offers practical strategies you can start using right away and reminds you that the goal is not to impress anyone else but to create a version of yourself that feels healthier, more authentic, and more satisfying to live with every day.

Listen and Learn: 

• How personality, once thought to be fixed, can actually change over time 
• How personality is shaped by both genetics and environment
• The Big Five personality model—what each trait means, how factors like conscientiousness overlap with neurodivergence such as ADHD, cultural caveats to the model, and how personality can shift over time through intentional habits and mindset
• How practicing new behaviors, like being more extroverted, can expand your authentic self rather than diminish it
• Why stepping outside of your comfort zone, even if it feels “inauthentic” at first, is actually part of growth, showing how personality is fluid
• How mindfulness, meditation, and acceptance practices can reduce anxiety and neuroticism
• The Personality Assessor Test and why results can sometimes surprise us, and how to embrace both strengths and limitations while exploring change or acceptance through openness, flexibility, and values

Resources:

• Olga’s Book, Me, But Better: The Science and Promise of Personality Change: https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9781668012543 
• Olga’s Website: Olgakhazan.com;  https://olgakhazan.com/
• Connect with Olga on Social Media: 
• Instagram: @olganator, https://www.instagram.com/olganator/
• X: https://x.com/olgakhazan
• Olga’s Substack: https://olgakhazan.substack.com/
• Find More of Olga’s Writing at https://www.theatlantic.com/ 
• Free Personality Test: https://www.personalityassessor.com/ 

About Olga Khazan

Olga Khazan is a staff writer for The Atlantic and the author of Weird: The Power of Being an Outsider in an Insider World and ME, BUT BETTER: The Science and Promise of Personality Change. She has also written for The New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, The Washington Post, Vox, and other publications. She is a two-time recipient of the International Reporting Project’s Journalism Fellowship and winner of the 2017 National Headliner Award for Magazine Online Writing. She lives with her husband and son in Northern Virginia.

Related Episodes:

• 77. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy with Jill Stoddard
• 102. A Liberated Mind with Steven Hayes
• 112. Nature vs. Nurture: Why Temperament Matters with Debbie and Yael
• 343. Heartbreak with Florence Williams
• 347. Job Changes & Career Pivots with Paula Brand
• 363. Worrying Is Optional with Ben Eckstein
• 385. Oliver Burkeman on Embracing Your Limitations

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