Barbecue is more than just food—it’s a way to connect, to celebrate, and to create lasting memories. In this special episode of the Backyard SmokeMaster BBQ Podcast, I opened up about the unexpected passing of my father and how barbecue played a role in bringing our family together over the years. This blog post is a reflection on that conversation and the importance of food in building traditions, honoring loved ones, and keeping memories alive.

My father, known affectionately as E.J., was the heart of our family gatherings. Whether it was a random Tuesday or a big holiday like the Fourth of July, our home was always a welcoming place for family and friends. And at the center of it all was food. Barbecue, in particular, was something that signified togetherness, even though my dad wasn’t exactly a pitmaster.

Growing up, I always knew that certain holidays meant my dad would be outside grilling. He didn’t fuss over rubs or intricate smoking techniques—he kept it simple. Burgers, hot dogs, hot links, and occasionally some ribs. There were no thermometers involved, no meticulous fire management. But none of that mattered. The most important thing was that everyone was together, enjoying food, laughing, and making memories.

As I grew older and became more passionate about barbecue, I started to realize that my dad’s approach to cooking on the grill wasn’t exactly what you’d call ‘technical.’ But what he lacked in precision, he made up for in heart. And that’s something I try to carry with me every time I fire up my smoker.

When I started to refine my skills and take barbecue more seriously, my dad became one of my biggest fans. He especially loved my spicy grilled shrimp, jerk chicken, and ribs. Every time I cooked for him, he would rave about how good it was, and that’s something that will always stay with me. Knowing that I could bring him joy through something I was passionate about meant the world to me.

Now that my dad is gone, I realize that barbecue is more than just a skill or a hobby—it’s a way of keeping his spirit alive. Every time I light up the grill, I think about him standing outside, flipping burgers, and welcoming everyone with open arms. I think about the warmth, the laughter, and the feeling of home that he created. That’s what barbecue is really about.

For those of us who love barbecue, we know that it’s never just about the food. It’s about who we share it with. It’s about passing down recipes, sharing meals, and continuing traditions. So if you’ve ever lost someone who meant the world to you, I encourage you to find a way to honor them through the things they loved. Whether that’s cooking their favorite meal, playing their favorite song, or just taking a moment to remember them.

One of the things I love most about barbecue is the community. It’s a culture built on sharing, learning, and bringing people together. That’s why I created the Backyard SmokeMaster Society—a place where BBQ lovers can connect, swap recipes, and inspire each other to keep the flame alive.

If you’re passionate about barbecue and want to be part of a welcoming, supportive community, I invite you to join us! Sign up today at https://backyardsmokemaster.com/society and become part of a family that shares your love for great barbecue and meaningful traditions.

Losing a loved one is never easy, but finding ways to keep their memory alive makes a difference. For me, that means keeping the barbecue going, sharing good food with family and friends, and remembering my dad with every meal cooked over fire and smoke.

If you have special memories of barbecuing with your loved ones, I’d love to hear about them. Drop a comment below or join the conversation in the Backyard SmokeMaster Society. Let’s continue to celebrate those we’ve lost by doing what they loved—gathering, cooking, and making memories that last a lifetime.