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Keep on truckin’!

Todd+Cathy

Time Stamps

8:11 Should my 18 year old daughter go on a trip with her friends

27:03 My daughter is struggling with her college roommates

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AI Summary

Summary

Future Gatherings and Conference Plans
Todd and Millie discuss plans for future gatherings after a recent conference. Todd expresses regret about not executing an idea to have the crowd cheer for Millie at the event. Millie mentions she missed the conference due to her daughter’s 18th birthday but had been following updates online. They discuss the possibility of organizing a future event at 1440 Multiversity, with Todd mentioning that other attendees are eager for continued meetups. Todd also suggests potentially involving Duffy in future plans.

Millie’s Chemotherapy and Diet Challenges
In the meeting, Millie discussed her ongoing chemotherapy treatment, mentioning that she has two more treatments left and anticipates feeling yucky for a few days after each session. She described her symptoms as feeling nauseous, having a sensitive tongue, and experiencing a loss of taste. Todd empathized with her situation, comparing it to morning sickness during pregnancy. Millie also mentioned that her diet has become similar to a pregnancy diet, with restrictions on raw foods. Todd expressed concern about her immune system being more depleted, but Millie clarified that her care team advises her to be cautious rather than making drastic lifestyle changes. The main concern is that if she gets sick, it could delay her treatment and impact her recovery.

Conference Experiences and Future Plans
Todd, Millie, and MaryEllen discussed their experiences and feelings about attending a recent conference. Millie shared her cautious approach to public spaces and her decision to continue attending dance classes. MaryEllen expressed her positive experience at the conference, despite it being intense. Todd mentioned his exhaustion from the conference and his plans to organize future events, possibly online. The group also discussed the presence of men at the conference, with Todd appreciating the male attendees stepping in. The conversation ended with an informal dialogue, inviting others to share their thoughts or experiences.

Discussing Daughter’s Senior Trip Plans
Millie discussed her concerns about her 18-year-old daughter and her two best friends planning a senior trip to Hawaii after graduation. Millie expressed her fears about her daughter’s readiness for the trip, given that it would be her first international travel and she had never traveled alone before. However, she also acknowledged that her daughter and her friends were responsible and she had contacts in Honolulu who could provide support if needed. Millie also mentioned that she was considering having her daughter contribute financially to the trip. Todd, on the other hand, encouraged Millie to trust her daughter and let her take responsibility for the trip, emphasizing that it was a part of her daughter’s transition to adulthood.

Parenting Daughters and Independence Concerns
Millie and Todd discussed their concerns about their daughters’ independence and safety. Millie expressed her worry about her daughter’s sheltered upbringing and the need for her to learn to navigate situations on her own. Todd suggested that their daughters should be given more freedom to learn from their experiences, but also emphasized the importance of trust and safety. They also discussed the challenges of parenting daughters, particularly in terms of their interactions with boys and the need for honest conversations about drinking and other adult issues. Todd shared a personal experience of his daughter’s encounter with a helpful stranger, which turned out to be a positive one. The conversation ended with Karni joining in, though her voice was still recovering from illness.

Navigating College Roommate Challenges
Karni discussed her daughter’s living situation in college, where she shares a suite with three others, including a roommate who has undergone significant personal changes and is now a nightmare to live with. The other two suite mates have also been unkind, making snarky comments and eye-rolling. Karni’s daughter has found a new group of friends to live with next year, but Karni is concerned about her daughter’s emotional well-being during the remaining four months. Todd empathized with Karni’s situation, suggesting that her daughter should be reminded that she will survive this difficult period and that it’s okay to feel upset. He also advised Karni to be there for her daughter and to focus on her own emotional well-being.

Navigating Peer Relationships and Self-Worth
Todd and Karni discussed their daughters’ experiences with peer relationships. Todd shared his daughter’s struggles with friends who had changed their behavior towards her, and how he tried to maintain a positive tone and remind her of her worth. Karni acknowledged the challenges of navigating these situations. Todd also suggested using nicknames for difficult peers to help his daughter maintain a sense of self-worth. Both agreed on the importance of maintaining a positive attitude and engaging in activities outside of school to help their daughters cope with these issues.

Navigating Interpersonal Conflicts and Double Standards
Todd and Karni discussed the challenges of dealing with interpersonal conflicts and double standards among their daughters and their friends. Todd emphasized the importance of setting boundaries and not internalizing negative comments, using the metaphor of a protective net. Karni shared her observations of a double standard in how her daughter and another girl were treated by their roommate. Todd advised Karni to not fix the situation, as it’s a matter of perception and not everyone will see it the same way. They both agreed on the importance of controlling one’s own actions, words, and thoughts in such situations.

Addressing Negative Energies and Events
Todd and Karni discussed the challenges their daughter is facing, particularly in dealing with negative energies from her roommates. Todd suggested that Karni could benefit from wearing a protective stone, similar to one he wears, to help filter out these negative energies. Todd also mentioned that he and his wife are planning a trip to Santa Monica, California, to host a community event at a local bookstore. The group also discussed the possibility of hosting a similar event in Chicago. Towards the end, Todd asked Millie to consider booking a hotel room for the Santa Monica event.