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Todd+Cathy

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AI Summary

Quick recap
The meeting focused on the emotional impact of the recent election and the need for change in how masculinity is perceived and practiced. The team discussed the challenges of raising boys in the current climate, the importance of corporate social responsibility, and the need for personal growth and relationships. They also shared their experiences as parents raising children in a polarized world and the importance of redefining success and hope based on personal values and treatment of others.
Summary
Navigating Election Emotions and Parenting
In the meeting, Todd Adams from Zen Parenting Radio expressed his struggle with the recent election and its impact on his community. He acknowledged the discomfort and emotions many were experiencing, and encouraged others to share their thoughts and feelings. Todd also mentioned a podcast he and his wife Kathy listened to, which helped him reframe his perspective on managing discomfort. The meeting was held as a space for community support and open discussion, with the floor open for anyone to ask a parenting question or share their experiences.
Redefining Masculinity and Patriarchal Norms
Elaine discussed her reflections on masculinity and the patriarchy, expressing her desire to raise her sons differently. She acknowledged that she had been too forgiving of her husband and her sons’ behavior, and decided to make changes in her family to promote a better understanding of masculinity. Todd shared his experience of having to explain his beliefs to his daughter, who is in a relationship with someone from a more Republican-leaning family. He emphasized the importance of understanding and respecting each other’s perspectives. Both Elaine and Todd agreed on the need for change in the way masculinity is perceived and practiced.
Navigating Patriarchy and Open Dialogue
Todd expresses his perspective on gender dynamics, the patriarchy, and the need for open dialogue after the 2020 US presidential election. He acknowledges the rage and anger felt by women, but hopes men can view it through a logical lens and hold space for those emotions. Todd wants to call people in, not out, recognizing that many voted for Trump and are “swimming in the same patriarchal waters.” He references a metaphor about a riptide from Glennon Doyle’s sister Amanda as a way to bring people together despite differing views.
Todd’s Emotional Shift and Focus
Todd expressed his feelings of acceptance and heartbreak after realizing the true nature of the country’s history and the root of its problems. He acknowledged the need for change and a shift in his approach, focusing more on local and literal actions that he has control over. Todd also mentioned his intention to be more discerning with his energy and to focus on communities that understand his perspective. He emphasized the importance of breaking and rebuilding, and the need to accept the reality of the situation rather than trying to change it. Todd also shared his intention to focus more on women and girls, and to take care of his students who are Latino and queer.
Raising Boys and Corporate Responsibility
The team discussed the challenges of raising boys in the current climate, with a focus on the need for change in how men treat women. They also touched on the topic of the economy and how it affects people’s priorities, with some expressing concern about the impact of tax breaks and the focus on personal finances. The conversation also highlighted the importance of corporate social responsibility and the need for change in how companies operate. The team agreed that the current situation is a wake-up call for them to reevaluate their priorities and redefine what it means to be a good person.
Todd’s Journey to Self-Discovery and Hope
Todd expressed his journey towards self-discovery and acceptance, acknowledging that he has been playing a role in catering to a system. He shared his realization that his hope has shifted from a macro level to a more micro level, focusing on personal growth and relationships. Todd also mentioned his intention to share the things that have been helping him cope with the current situation. Elaine, on the other hand, shared her perspective on hope, emphasizing the importance of self-reflection and energy preservation. Both agreed on the need to focus on personal growth and relationships, and to be more intentional about their actions and energy expenditure.
Relationship Dynamics and Empathy in Partnerships
The group discussed the dynamics of relationships, particularly those involving strong women and their partners. Jenn expressed her concern about the potential discomfort some women might feel when they see other women in positions of power, and how this could impact their own relationships. Elaine shared her own experiences and agreed that the issue might be unconscious for many women. Todd shared his perspective on creating equal partnerships and the importance of understanding and empathizing with different perspectives. The group also discussed the challenges of maintaining healthy relationships and the importance of communication and mutual respect.
Adapting to Life’s Changes and Challenges
Todd and Elaine discussed the challenges and changes in their lives, particularly in relation to their roles as parents and community members. They acknowledged the need to adapt to different circumstances and the importance of being present in the moment. Todd shared his experiences of changing his focus from macro to micro issues, such as taking care of his parents and children, and how these changes have impacted his life. Elaine expressed admiration for Todd’s ability to adapt and change, and they both agreed on the importance of being open to new experiences and perspectives. They also touched on the topic of political change and the need for collective action, with Todd expressing his desire to see positive change in his lifetime.
Parenting in a Polarized World
Todd, Elaine, and Jennifer discussed their experiences as parents raising children in a polarized world. Todd shared his experiences as a poll watcher and his daughter Skylar’s involvement in politics. Elaine expressed her concern about raising her children in a neutral manner, fearing it might remove their sense of whimsy and innocence. Jennifer shared her concerns about raising her three sons to be conscious and aware men, and her uncertainty about whether she’s doing enough. Todd emphasized the importance of discernment, nuance, and critical thinking in parenting, and encouraged the group to focus on raising their children to be better individuals rather than worrying about their own feelings.
Redefining Success and Hope in Society
Todd expressed his concerns about the current state of society, comparing it to a replication of an ideal that has become dysfunctional and disfigured. He emphasized the need to redefine success and hope, suggesting that these concepts should be based on personal values and treatment of others, rather than external measures like wealth or power. Todd also shared his personal experiences and reflections, including his interactions with a 101-year-old woman who voted in every election she could. Elaine agreed with Todd’s points, appreciating his authenticity and the importance of staying hopeful despite the challenges.