Three wasted pincers, not how levers work, and Splinter King-Kongs Nyssa before she inexplicably exits the show

* * *

When professional arse-hat, Turlough, sabotages the TARDIS, The Doctor, Nyssa, Tegan — and Turlough — materialise aboard a plague ship bound for Terminus, a mysterious space station at the centre of the known universe. What a coinky-dink, you might say, but we’re not done yet because a couple of pirate raiders have boarded the ship in search of treasure at just this time, found nothing of value, and have inexplicably been marooned there by their comrades.

Very slow fade to Terminus, where it transpires dumping the fuel cells would cause the universe to be destroyed and, wouldn’t you know it, bloody Turlough’s just gone ahead and prepared a nice, steaming dump. So while Tegan and Turlough learn what a TV dinner feels like, and Nyssa strips down to her underwear, the resident guards and an unexplained rodent slave nurse act out some petty, pointless charades.

* * *

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