Meet Former AFL super star, now founder and CEO of Outside The Locker Room – Jake Edwards. Part of the new game changers forging a path for transparency, conversation and a sense of community that’s required around Mental Health.

On this episode Jake shares his journey from Hero to Zero then back again. Battling the scars that aren’t visible to others, how to build resilience, the new bro-code and why it’s essential to take the first step in asking for help.

Great Expectations

When you come from a long line of professional footballers, the stakes are high for you to follow in the shoes of your father and family. Jakes story was no different. What he didn’t expect was the deep emotional impact the pressure would have on him personally and the subconscious “not good enough” negative self talk that was slowly pulling him further into a point of no return.

This wasn’t the landscape to voice any of that – so keeping up appearances and pushing what was then undiagnosed depression away – out of sight was the only coping mechanism Jake knew at that point.

That choice and shame around feeling unworthy and created a series of set backs and poor decisions that ultimately led Jake to a forced decision from his entire’s life goals and purpose at pro football and finally an attempt on his own life.

shame  /ʃeɪm/noun2. a regrettable or unfortunate situation or action.“what a shame Ellie won’t be here”synonyms: pity, misfortune, crying shame, cause for regret, source of regret, sad thing, unfortunate thing; verb1.a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behaviour.“she was hot with shame”synonyms: humiliation, mortification, chagrin, ignominy, loss of face, shamefacedness, embarrassment, indignity, abashment, discomfort, discomfiture, discomposure2. make (someone) feel ashamed.“I tried to shame him into giving some away”synonyms:  humiliate, mortify, make someone feel ashamed, chagrin, embarrass, abash, chasten, humble, put someone in their place, take down a peg or two, cut down to size, show up;​

The Shame Game

Dealing with depression, addiction and not coping created such a level of shame, guilt and fear it was only at rock bottom after rehab that there was a point he could discuss this with family.

That kitchen table discussion changed the course of Jakes relationship with his parents, his father and started with the ability to change the relationship with himself. Once the conversation was out there – he surprisingly learnt it wasn’t so foreign after all.

Here are Jakes steps and tools to regain a sense of perspective, personal self worth and clarity to move forward with purpose when you are rebuilding your life dealing with a darker voice, a disruptive past to build a new future.

1. Owning The Truth

It’s can be confronting but at the same time totally liberating when you can stand in your truth. No one can knock you over from that.

Understanding exactly where you stand and owning this with those closest is a solid foundation from which to work on yourself, your game plan and also build a dream team around you.

2. Bro Code & Asking For Help

Your good mates accept you as you are,