Hello and welcome to day four of the 2020 Love Vision Podcast Challenge. This week on the podcast, I'm doing something a little different in celebration of Valentine's Day. I want to help you get refocused on your love life so you get unstuck and can move forward. Each day this week on the podcast, I'm releasing a mini episode that will help you get clear on your goals and your love life, overcome blocks getting in your way, and you'll end the challenge with creating some tangible action steps that will change your love life. Today is day four and it's all about trusting love. So if you haven't listened to days one, two, and three yet, I highly recommend you start there first. It'll make today's topic much more understandable. So today is all about trusting love and trusting something new. Now, this might seem counterintuitive or it might even feel like it doesn't apply to you or you don't think you fall into this trap, but I think most of us do, and part of that is because of biology, which I'll explain in a minute. But sometimes what you actually want, so in this case, you want a healthy, happy, loving partnership with someone that ideally lasts for many years, if not your life, and a lot of times that can actually feel so scary that you might actually sabotage yourself. Sabotaging yourself can look like continuing to pick the "wrong" guys. It can look like continuing to stay single and not even try to date. It can look like just going on date after date like a freaking robot and not trying anything different. It can also look like putting off getting support in this area from a coach or a therapist who can actually help you do some of the work, so that your patterns and habits change. Now, the reason why we do this, I mean, for a lot of reasons, but the biggest thing is any kind of change, whether it's a change towards something that you don't know anything about or a change you don't want, or even if it's towards a change of something that you want, it can still feel really, really scary. Our brain is wired to operate on autopilot. Our brain just wants to use the littlest amount of energy it takes to perform a task. And this isn't a bad thing, right? This is a good thing. Imagine how exhausting life would be if you had to consciously think about every single little thing that you did each day. If you had to consciously think, "Okay, I'm going to put my sock on, and then I put my shoe on, and put my foot in my shoe, and then I'll tighten the laces," I mean, that would just be exhausting. That's what it's like when you're a two, or three, or four, or five year old, you're just learning the drills of day to day life, but eventually, all of these things that we do just become nature, becomes habit and we can do them on autopilot. And because we can do so many things on autopilot, that allows us to do a lot of other things like do our jobs and have deep intimate relationships, and it allows us to do things like rock climb, or run, or hike, or play an instrument, or write a book, or do all these other things that we get to do as humans. When it comes to your love life, it really is no different. You may not want to sit at home every night feeling sorry for yourself about your love life. You may not want to continue going on date after date after date that leads to nowhere. You may not want to continue attracting unhealthy relationships. But on some level, there's a comfort there. You know what to do. You know how to handle it. You know how to deal with the frustrations and the feelings around being upset or feeling lonely. You just know what to do. And there's definitely a familiarity in that, there's a comfort in that. And sometimes that comfort can sometimes feel like love, and that makes it really hard to: a) be attracted to someone who's actually exhibiting healthy, happy relationships. And also what it can do is it can just make it really scary to do something different. So today's assignment is a little bit different. I do