The Vermont Conversation with David Goodman
‘Skiing saved my son’s life’
Ryan DeLena was a “problem child.”
He had frequent emotional outbursts, and his parents’ efforts to control him proved futile. Mental health professionals and teachers said Ryan should be removed from the public schools in suburban Boston where he lived and placed into therapeutic schools. While there, he was subjected to physical restraints and heavy medication.
Nothing helped. At age 9, he landed in a psychiatric hospital. His problems only got worse.
In a desperate attempt to connect with his troubled son, Ryan’s father Rob took his son skiing at a small Massachusetts ski area. That was the beginning of a transformation for young Ryan. He channeled his energies into skiing and climbing, and now nurtures a dream to become a professional ski mountaineer.
Ryan and Rob DeLena have continued to ski together around the world, including in Antarctica. Ryan finished high school and enrolled at Northern Vermont University, where he is a junior studying outdoor education.
Ryan and Robert DeLena co-wrote a new memoir, “Without Restraint: How Skiing Saved My Son’s Life.” It is a harrowing and heartwarming story told by father and son about a misunderstood and troubled boy, and the bond the two forged as they found Ryan’s path.
“Through skiing and the adventures we experienced together, I learned everyone was wrong about Ryan, especially me,” wrote Rob, an attorney who runs a legal staffing agency in Boston.
Ryan, now 21, concluded with an improbable sentiment. “If I was offered the chance to have my childhood over again, growing up like a normal kid, I’d say no thanks,” he wrote.
“Despite all the pain and hardship, I now appreciate that I’m strong enough to handle anything,” he said.