February 22, 2023

Studio Talk Podcast: Real Conversations About Mental Health

A Conversation About When to Switch Your Therapist

Season 2 Episode 8

In this episode our host and co-hosts discuss some of the reasons you might want to consider switching your therapist. 

The discussion covers this rarely talked about  issue and makes an effort to clarify and provide important tips about it. 

Co-host Lisa Early leads the conversation with hosts Xiomara A. Sosa. She provides tips on how to recognize the signs of when it might be time to switch your therapist and advise on how to go about doing so. They also provide resources and references to check out. 

The hosts have an honest and open discussion regarding this subject matter and invite the listeners to share their stories with them in the comments. 

As always, Studio Talk Podcast encourages their listeners to provide feedback, comments as well as their opinions and experiences about their own experiences with major life transitions that impacted their mental health. The discussion offers resources and references for listeners to review and examine and listeners are encouraged to do their own research and draw their own conclusions about the issues discussed. As with most issues, there are negatives and positives found and the co-hosts recognize that as reality and have an honest conversation about it.

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Signs it’s Time to Switch Your Therapist:

• Is not a good fit
• Culturally incompetent
• It doesn’t feel like anything is changing even though you are committed, compliant and 
• working at it
• You can’t be honest with the therapist
• Therapist doesn't have the particular experience you need or want
• Inappropriate behavior by the therapist
• Only giving advice instead of helping you work through your issues/problems/challenges
• Only talks about themselves, discloses too much, etc. 
• Sexists, homophonic, or any bigotry 
• They aren’t listening to you
• There’s too much dependence on the therapist/enabling
• Lost sense of why you’re going to therapy
• Cultural competency issues
• Progress in your treatment/do they ask about your progress
• Plan/goals set
• Not a good fit/don’t click
• Feel judged/reprimanded/in trouble/punitive
• Too familiar or too impersonal
• Your needs have changed 
• Outgrown the therapist
• Language barrier
• Want to see someone who offers a specific type of therapy
• Need someone who offers online services
• Have experienced an awkward interaction 
• Feel unsafe  
• Have encountered a new trauma and need a new perspective
• Be switching from couples counseling to individual (or vice versa)

You haven’t been making progress:

It’s hard to know what to expect from therapy, but while you shouldn’t expect instant results, you should feel like you’re making progress over time. 

Ideally, your therapist should be tracking your progress and helping you work towards your identified goals. If you haven’t seen improvements, or if you haven’t been working towards anything specific, changing therapists may help you see results more quickly. 

Confidentiality problems:

Except under certain legal circumstances that require therapists to contact authorities, your care is always confidential. If you have any privacy concerns, ask questions.

Too much contact:

Your therapist may be crossing boundaries if you’re receiving frequent calls, texts, or social media interactions outside of your formal therapy sessions. 

Of course, this can be different if you’re engaged in a text- or virtual-based therapy arrangement (such as an online therapy platform like Talkspace), but the contact rules should be clear and consistently enforced, regardless of the modality.

Too little contact:

On the flip side, a therapist you can’t reliably reach is cause for concern for obvious reasons. Therapists are free to set rules about how you can get in touch with them after hours or outside of sessions, but if you’re following the rules and still can’t get your messages returned, you might need a change.

You don’t feel heard:

It’s important that you feel like your therapist is really listening to what you have to say. If they’re dismissive or don’t seem to understand where you’re coming from, you might eventually begin to struggle to open up to them. 

For example, some members of the LGBTQIA+ community have reported experiences where they feel their therapists don’t take their concerns seriously. This can be a clear sign of a bad therapist.

Management problems:

If there are problems with late or inaccurate billing, late or broken appointments, or any other indicators of practice management problems, consider investigating why. 

Every practice has busy seasons or staff changes that can cause occasional operational hiccups, but persistent problems raise a question about whether your relationship with this particular therapist will be stable over time.

They don’t offer the services you’re looking for:

Nearly all therapists have experience treating things like depression and anxiety, but some have limited experience with less common conditions, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder or some personality disorders. The types of therapy a professional offers may also vary. 

If you want to treat a specific issue or are interested in a certain form of therapy, you’ll need to find a therapist who offers what you’re looking for. Your experience in therapy treatment might have been positive up to this point, but you may need to look elsewhere if your current therapist can’t provide the kind of care you need. 

How to Switch Therapists:

Even if you recognize several of the above signs you should change therapists and you’re confident in your decision, changing therapists can feel overwhelming. These tips will guide you through the process of how to break up with your therapist so you can seamlessly transition to a different therapist who’s a better match for you. 

Have a discussion: 

Let your current therapist know that you’re thinking about seeing someone new. If you’re comfortable doing so, you may want to schedule a final appointment so you can talk things through. If you’d prefer not to have a face-to-face discussion, however, you can communicate that you’re leaving via text or email. 

Request a records transfer:

During the final session with your therapist, ask for a copy of your medical records or request that they transfer records to your new provider. While therapists aren’t legally required to share psychotherapy notes, you can ask them to send over any other records they may have.  

Reflect on what didn’t work:

Switching therapists is an opportunity to find someone who’s better equipped to meet your needs. That’s why it can be so valuable to think about why your last therapeutic relationship wasn’t successful. If you can identify or pinpoint any issues, you can then take steps to avoid the same conflicts going forward. 

Figure out what you’re looking for:

Unless you have a serious condition and need immediate help, you don’t have to rush into finding a new therapist. If possible, set aside time to determine what you’re looking for. 

For example:

• Are you hoping to find someone who offers a specific style of therapy, such as acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) or types of CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy)? 
• Do you need someone who can meet with you during the evenings or on weekends? 
• Do you want someone skilled in a certain area, like someone with experience working with gender identity issues, compulsions, or rage management? 

Making a list of your needs can help you find a therapist who meets your criteria. 

Find someone new:

Once you know what you want, you can explore different options and search for a therapist with the qualities you’re seeking. You may want to schedule consultations with potential therapists so you can meet with them and see if they’re a good fit. 

Mental Health Resources:

https://www.thex-studio.org/resources

References:

https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/signs-to-switch-therapists/

https://www.talkspace.com/blog/switch-therapists-how-to/#:~:text=First%20and%20foremost%2C%20there's%20nothing,switch%20to%20a%20new%20therapist.

Studio Talk Podcast contact: studiotalkmentalhealth@gmail.com

Learn more about our hosts: 

Host Xiomara A. Sosa https://www.swmhs.net/

Co-host Victoria Lockridge https://www.wildvioletcounseling.com/

Co-host Lisa Early https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/lisa-a-early-summerville-sc/1044400

Studio Talk Podcast and the information provided by Xiomara A. Sosa, Victoria Lockridge and Lisa Early are solely intended for educational and social change advocacy purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although they are licensed mental health counselors, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical, psychological, or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician or appropriate mental health provider before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.

Copyright XAS Consulting, LLC DBA Studio Talk Podcast: Real Conversations About Mental Health

PLEASE READ: If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. If you are in crisis, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ or 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or your local emergency services.