Spark My Muse

Spark My Muse

Eps 94: The (untrue) Stories We Tell Ourselves in Relationships, Guest Scott Gornto

December 30, 2016

The stories we tell ourselves about problems in our life, what other people are thinking, or what other people are thinking about us, are so thoroughly polluted by our backstory, our typical anxieties, and other factors, that these stories have the power to hijack and destroy our most important relationships. Worse yet–it can all happen while we assume we are perceiving reality fairly well. Research shows that when people in conflict compare their stories, they find radically disparate interpretations of reality. It's time to find a better way to deal with the discrepancies that create such a mess in everyday life.

Today, my guest, therapist, speaker and author R. Scott Gornto and I discuss the fascinating ways we construct reality and try to function in it. We also cover the main themes from his book "The Stories We Tell Ourselves: Stop Jumping to Conclusions. Free Yourself from Anxiety. Transform Your Relationships" as well as a simple but brilliant four-step-method to assess and reconcile our stories with each other to foster deeper and healthier relationships–instead of strife–when trouble arises.

Thank you for listening in today. Be sure to link up with the show notes at that have a visual reference of the show and related links. (They cost just $1 for a month's worth of show notes!)

This show has the potential to help out a lot of people, so please spread it around!

This is the final show of 2016. Thank you for making it a great year. If you'd like to connect with me, find me in these spots:

TWITTER: @lisadelay
INSTAGRAM: @lisacolondelay