In this episode, we listen to advice offered by a mother to her young son, as portrayed in Sangam Literary work, Kalithogai 86, penned by Maruthan Ilanaakanaar. The verse is situated in the ‘Marutham’ or ‘Farmlands landscape’ and contrasts the positive and negative qualities of a man.

தலைவி
மை படு சென்னி மழ களிற்று ஓடை போல்,
கை புனை முக்காழ் கயந் தலைத் தாழ,
பொலம் செய் மழுவொடு வாள் அணி கொண்ட
நலம் கிளர் ஒண் பூண் நனைத்தரும் அவ் வாய்
கலந்து கண் நோக்கு ஆர, காண்பு இன் துகிர்மேல்
பொலம் புனை செம்பாகம் போர் கொண்டு இமைப்ப,
கடி அரணம் பாயா நின் கை புனை வேழம்,
தொடியோர் மணலின் உழக்கி, அடி ஆர்ந்த
தேரை வாய்க் கிண்கிணி ஆர்ப்ப, இயலும் என்
போர் யானை, வந்தீக, ஈங்கு!

செம்மால்! வனப்பு எலாம் நுந்தையை ஒப்பினும், நுந்தை
நிலைப் பாலுள் ஒத்த குறி என் வாய்க் கேட்டு ஒத்தி;

கன்றிய தெவ்வர்க் கடந்து களம் கொள்ளும்
வென்றிமாட்டு ஒத்தி, பெரும! மற்று ஒவ்வாதி,
‘ஒன்றினேம் யாம்’ என்று உணர்ந்தாரை, நுந்தை போல்,
மென் தோள் நெகிழ விடல்

பால் கொளல் இன்றி, பகல் போல், முறைக்கு ஒல்காக்
கோல் செம்மை ஒத்தி, பெரும! மற்று ஒவ்வாதி,
கால் பொரு பூவின் கவின் வாட, நுந்தைபோல்,
சால்பு ஆய்ந்தார் சாய விடல்

வீதல் அறியா விழுப் பொருள் நச்சியார்க்கு
ஈதல்மாட்டு ஒத்தி, பெரும! மற்று ஒவ்வாதி,
மாதர் மென் நோக்கின் மகளிரை, நுந்தைபோல்,
நோய் கூர நோக்காய் விடல்

ஆங்க
திறன் அல்ல யாம் கழற, யாரை நகும், இம்
மகன் அல்லான் பெற்ற மகன்?
மறை நின்று, தாம் மன்ற வந்தீத்தனர்

தலைவன் :
‘ஆயிழாய்! தாவாத எற்குத் தவறு உண்டோ? காவாது ஈங்கு
ஈத்தை, இவனை யாம் கோடற்கு’

தலைவி
……………………………………..சீத்தை; யாம்
கன்றி அதனைக் கடியவும், கை நீவி,
குன்ற இறு வரைக் கோண்மா இவர்ந்தாங்கு,
தந்தை வியல் மார்பில் பாய்ந்தான் அறன் இல்லா
அன்பிலி பெற்ற மகன்.

The lady’s voice continues to ring aloud and the words can be translated as follows:

“Akin to the ornament hanging on the black head of a bull elephant, the well-etched, three-stranded chain dangles on your tender head. Along with the axe made of gold, a sword too hangs on that exquisite, shining jewel, moistened by your sweet mouth, a sight that is an insatiable delight for my eyes to behold! On an alluring coral platform, in the stance of an attack but never actually pouncing on a guarded fort, partly made of gold, stands the elephant, handmade for you. As you pull it along, you muddle the sand houses made by maiden wearing bangles, and move, as anklets in the shape of a toad’s mouth resound. My dear battle elephant, come to me!

My little lord! In your handsome appearance, though you are like your father, when it comes to lasting qualities, please listen to my words and follow course.

In overcoming furious enemies, seizing the battlefield and claiming victory, be like your father; However, don’t be like your father, in making the soft arms of those who believe they are one with him, thin away!

In rendering justice, without favouring any one side, akin to the swivel in a yoke, which slants not, be like your father! However, don’t be like your father, in bringing sorrow to those, who believe in his greatness, akin to how a flower’s beauty fades, when plucked by the wind!

In offering with generosity to all those, who come seeking wealth to him, without ever refusing, be like your father! However, don’t be like your father, in abandoning and bringing suffering to women, who have a gentle and beautiful gaze!

As I chide mentioning all these wrong qualities, who are you smiling at, O son, the offshoot of the wrong-doer? Oh! All this time he was hiding away, and now he has come before us!

Man:
O maiden wearing well-etched ornaments! Why these accusations on me, who has done no wrong? Give him to me, for me to hold and rejoice!

Lady:
O unworthy one! Even as I stop him in anger, pushing away my hand, akin to a tiger cub that leaps at the base of a mountain, he has pounced on his father’s wide chest, the unjust son of this loveless man!”

Time to delve into the nuances. The verse is situated in the context of a love quarrel between the man and the lady, owing to the man’s seeking of courtesans, and in this verse, the lady expresses her thoughts to her young son, as the man listens by. As in the previous verse, the lady starts by talking about the adornments on the little boy, a three-stranded gold chain on his head like the face ornament of an elephant, and then about the necklace he wears, made of gold, with pendants in the shape of an axe and a sword. She talks about how the little boy’s drool drenches these golden ornaments and how that’s such a sweet sight for her to see. Then, she mentions how the boy is pulling a golden elephant on a coral platform and messing up the sand houses made by little girls. She also sketches for us, the tinkling sound of the boy’s anklets. The striking aspect of this description is in how the lady calls her son as ‘a battle elephant’! Mothers are known to cuddle with their little ones, referring to them by different animal names and it makes me smile to see this timeless quality reflecting in this Sangam mother.

Returning, we find the mother telling her boy, that indeed he looks as handsome as his father. However, the boy must take care to follow mama’s advice when it came to other qualities, she says. Then, in that three-step format, she elaborates on the ways the boy must be like his father and the ways to not be like his father. The qualities that the boy must follow in the footsteps of his father are, in attaining victory over enemies in a battlefield, in rendering justice without partiality, and offering charity ceaselessly to those who come seeking to him. At the same time, the mother says the boy must never be like his father, in thinning the arms of women who love him, in bringing sorrow and forsaking them.

As she’s saying these words sternly to the boy, she notices the boy smiling. She wonders who he’s smiling at, only to turn and find her man walking towards her, and she exclaims how all these days the man has been hiding his face and now he comes there. To his angry wife, the man tries to say that he has done nothing wrong and asks her to let him hold his little son. To this, the lady replies saying even if I were to stop this little brat, like a tiger cub pouncing on huge mountain, the boy jumps on the father’s chest. So unjust is the son of her loveless man, she concludes. Apart from the anger of the lady well expressed and her wisdom of seeing the right and wrong in her man, the highlight here is the unconditional love and jubilant joy, a young child feels for their parent, especially the one less frequently seen, etched vividly in the last few lines of this verse!