Most people think it's the other person when it's really self. If you choose a bad relationship it's by choice. An unhealthy relationship won't grow. If people loved self the way they want to be loved lives would greatly change. People are either preying or their the prey. Whichever it is it's by choice! A person prey on others because of what's inside. People allow themselves to be the prey because of what's inside. Your way is obviously not working, it's time to get off of the wheel.