Real Talk with Mary Contrary and Starfish

Real Talk with Mary Contrary and Starfish


#19. Carnell Alexander - Dad by Default

June 18, 2021

This is the story of Carnell Alexander, who became a Dad by Default when a new mother applying for welfare listed him as a deadbeat father to a child that even DNA proved wasn't his.


Father’s Day is coming up, and here is a father’s story.


Sneaky ex-girlfriend


One fine day in 1991, police pulled over Alexander at a traffic stop and arrested him for evading child support. His arrest followed accusations of being a deadbeat father by the state of Michigan, where he lived then. It was shocking for him to learn that an ex-girlfriend of his had listed his name as the father of her child when filling out TANF documents. According to the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, TANF (Temporary Assistance for Needy Families) is a time-limited program that assists families with children when the parents or other responsible relatives cannot provide for the family's basic needs. The Federal government provides grants to States to run the TANF program.


The ex said she decided to put down Alexander’s name, even though she knew he couldn’t be the father. They knew each other from the neighborhood and had a one-night stand but not around the time she conceived.She admitted to the court that she was struggling at the time, and that naming someone as the father of her child was just a  way to get the help she desperately needed.


Nevertheless, shortly after the ex got into the TANF program, the state started a paternity case against Alexander to collect money for the assistance it provided.


 


If you’d like to get more RealTalk stories, subscribe here.