God's Solutions for Today's Problems #24

Our passage from the Word of God today is Ecclesiastes 7:9. It reads, “Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.”

Our quote for today is from Benjamin Franklin. He said, “Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.”

Our problem today is "The Problem of Anger in Your Life" (part 2) from the book, "The Guide to Biblical Counseling" by Dr. Tim Clinton and Dr. Ron Hawkins.

Marcus Aurelius said, "How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it."

Expressions of Anger

Anger always finds an expression. It is often revealed as:

- a response to a person, situation, or event; to an imaginary or anticipated event; or to memories of traumatic or enraging situations.

- a response to a real or perceived injustice or hurt --- in the form of frustration, betrayal, deprivation, injustice, exploitation, manipulations, criticism, violence, disapproval, humiliation, intimidation, threats, and so on.

- a response when a boundary in their life has been crossed.

People handle anger by:

Internalization: Sometimes people repress the anger, meaning they deny anger's presence. This is unhealthy because even though it may not be observable, the anger is still present --- turned inward on the person. Repressed anger can lead to numerous emotional and physical problems including depression, anxiety, hypertension, and ulcers.

Or people may suppress their anger, meaning they acknowledge anger and then stuff it. With this approach to coping, they redirect anger-driven energy into unrelated activity. This can be effective, though it neglects addressing the root causes of anger. One risk is that people who suppress may become cynical or passive-aggressive --- an indirect form of revenge manifesting as sarcasm, lack of cooperation, gossip, and so on.

Ventilation: Healthy expression of anger entails non-aggressive, gently assertive actions that promote the respect of self and others. This addresses problems in a constructive manner.

Unhealthy/sinful expression involves acting in an aggressive way that hurts others. Whether one yells, uses violence, or withdraws, the motivation involves revenge or "payback." Persons expressing anger this way might say, "At least you know where I'm coming from!" However, they refuse to acknowledge the destructive force of their expression.

Physical Symptoms: Physical symptoms of anger include headaches, ulcers, stomach cramps, high blood pressure, colitis, and heart conditions.

Emotional Symptoms: Emotional symptoms include criticism, sarcasm, gossip, meanness, impatience, being demanding, withholding love, and refusing to forgive.

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