God's Solutions for Today's Problems #12

Our passage from the Word of God today is Hebrews 13:4. It reads, "Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge."

Our quote for today is from Augustine of Hippo. He said, "You are not ashamed of your sin [in committing adultery] because so many men commit it. Man's wickedness is now such that men are more ashamed of chastity than of adultery. Murderers, thieves, perjurers, false witnesses, plunderers and fraudsters are detested and hated by people generally, but whoever will sleep with his servant girl in brazen adultery is liked and admired for it, and people make light of the damage to his soul. And if any man has the nerve to say that he is chaste and faithful to his wife and this gets known, he is ashamed to mix with other men, whose behaviour is not like his, for they will mock him and despise him and say he's not a real man; for man's wickedness is now of such proportions that no one is considered a man unless he is overcome by adultery, while one who overcomes adultery and stays chaste is considered unmanly."

Our problem today is "The Problem of Adultery in Your Life" (part 1) from the book, "The Guide to Biblical Counseling" by Dr. Tim Clinton and Dr. Ron Hawkins.

Definitions and Key Thoughts:

- Adultery occurs when someone has a sexual relationship with someone other than one's spouse. This relationship may or may not include an emotional connection.

- Adultery may also involve an emotional affair. Less understood, an emotional affair can be even more fthreatening to a marriage than physical adultery. It occurs when the husband or wife turns to someone outside the marriage for primary emotional support. For example, when a couple is experiencing conflict, hostility, or distancing, and the husband or wife turns to a friend of the opposite sex for companionship, support, and sharing of personal information, an emotional affair has begun.

- Tragically, infidelity in marriage is becoming increasingly common. Christians are just as likely to be tempted to marital unfaithfulness as non-Christians. Women are as likely to have an affair as men.

- Poor communication, unresolved conflict, and/or unrealistic expectations leading to marital dissatisfaction are common reason for extramarital affairs. Any perceived need that goes unfulfilled in marriage will seek its expression elsewhere.

- Spouses may become involved in affairs because they are exposed to situations for which they are unprepared or have not set wise boundaries.

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