ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT HAVING A PRE-TEEN SON IN THE HOUSE?

I don’t know about you, but the thought of having teenage boys (currently a pre-teen son) in my house in a few years is a little bit scary. How can we moms help to prepare our sons to transition into their teenage years? What do our boys need from us?  

We have a special guest today to help us answer some of these questions. We’re going to talk about 3 messages our teenage sons need us to hear.

Welcome to Episode 27 of Redeeming the Chaos with Laurie Christine.

GUEST INTERVIEW – MICHAEL ROSS

Our special guest today is Michael Ross. Michael Ross is an award-winning author and former editor of BREAKAWAY, a national magazine for teen guys published by Focus on the Family. Several of his books include BOOM: A GUY’S GUIDE TO GROWING UP, WHAT YOUR SON ISN’T TELLING YOU, and an unofficial Minecraft guide BUILDING FAITH BLOCK BY BLOCK. Michael and his wife Tiffany live near St. Louis, Missouri, with their son Christopher. (Affiliate links)

This is part one of a two part episode in which Michael and I talk about how we as moms can be intentional about connecting with our sons during their teenage years.

You can listen to my interview with Michael here: 

Here is an overview of what Michael and I discussed.

WHAT DOES YOUR PRE-TEEN SON WANT YOU TO KNOW

There are three universal longings or messages that your pre-teen / teen boy wants you to know and understand. In addition, there are three “essential relational links” that will help you connect with your son during this time of transition.

MESSAGE #1 – I’m not you.

* It’s important to be able to step into your son’s shoes, listen to what he is thinking and learn what he is feeling. Give your son space to grow into his own self and develop his own unique personality. * Try to imagine some of the pressures your son is facing and the issues that he has to deal with. * Relational Link: Empathy 

MESSAGE #2 – Trust me as I trust you.

* Give your son opportunities to prove his trustworthiness as he is given greater responsibilities* Model the same kind of behavior you want your son to exhibit – make sure he can trust you to do what you say and live a life of integrity* Relational Link: Trust

MESSAGE #3 – Stay close to me AND let me breathe

* Be intentional about spending time with your son, even if they resist* At the same time, give your son space to be himself* Your teen / tween boy is looking for boundaries – he wants to know you care enough about him to keep him safe. But at the same time, he wants you to trust him with greater responsibilities and privileges.* Relational Link – Consistent and balanced connection

NEXT TIME – MISTAKES MOMS MAKE

I hope you were encouraged today by my conversation with Michael Ross. Please join me again next week as we finish our discussion. We’ll be talking about mistakes moms make with their teenage or pre-teen sons, how to nurture your son’s relationship with the L...