Are you still using a fork? Gosh.  And a spoon too? Eegad!  Friend, you are never going to get anywhere in life with that love of flatware. It’s time to open your minds to the world of eating with wood or bamboo. That’s right, good ol’ pals — the chopstick.  Chopsticks — the utensil for those who aren’t a bunch of drooling dipshits. Mort Lawry saying — Chopsticks, get yours today. Now for EMR Episode number five-zero-four. Enjoy!
YOUR HOSTS: TOMMY & PAULIE
YOUR ANALOG KID: JERRY
YOUR EM NEWS CHICA: TABI
YOUR SO-CAL UPDATE: COL. NYLEN
YOUR EM COMMENTATOR: BEN

“I eat with chopsticks. Can you
_eat with chopsticks? Just pick
_up your chopsticks and I’ll 
_teach you how. Some people
_use chopsticks; they always
_use chopsticks. So, try out
_your chopsticks right now.
_Two little sticks; they’re made
_out of wood, and they help
_you to pick up your lunch.
_Your lunch. And if you practice,
_then you’d get good and you’ll
_find you can pick up a bunch
_to munch. Eat noodles with
_chopsticks. Eat dumplings with
_chopsticks. Eat sushi with
_chopsticks...“

EM NEWS
– Slithering Welcome Committee
– Lost Money Looking For Good Home
– And a whole lot more

MENTALTAINMENT
– Cinema PaulieDiso hanging on by a thread
– The Day…The Music…Was Saved
– Grohl, Hudson, Parker
– The Ticker Flashback
– Birthdays + tons more

ETCETERA
– An all new Top Ten List
– We speak with Colonel Nylen (not tonight)
– The Famous Names Game
– Plenty of great odd tidbits
– The Super Summer Soda Smackdown (semi-finals NEXT week)
– An all new Analog Head-Trip
– So much more, your head will spin!