Burt Smelvin here with my fantastic Burt Smelvin Orchestra, coming to you live from Diddlehoo Arena in beautiful downtown Lincoln, Nebraska. I’d like to take a moment to tell you about a fascinating new product that has me all a tingle.  All new Rubba-Dub Ball Cleanser.  Ever find your sack feeling a bit greasy?  Maybe smelling a bit more like the trashcan than the flower bed? Friend, we’ve all been there. Rubba-Dub Ball Cleanser will take care of it. Nay. It will take care of you. Rubba-Dub will shine your pouch to a shimmering sheen and leave it fresh feeling every time. Next time you head out for the evening, take a minute to Rubba-Dub…you’ll thank yourself in the morning. And now, friends, back to our program — E-M-R number four-fifty-two. Hit it boys!
YOUR HOSTS: TOMMY & TABI
YOUR EM COMMENTATOR: JOSHERS
YOUR CINEMATIC TITANIC: PAULIE
YOUR HAPPY BASTARD: JERRY

“Stumbling past your house,
_baby, at the break of day. I
_thought I saw your silhouette
_dancing ‘cross the shade. And
_I went down to the mission —
_I called and called your name,
_’til an angel with a face like
_yours came down and let me 
_in. I thought I saw your re-
_flection in a cigarette machine.
_In a bottle in the gutter. In a 
_window on the street. In a 
_storefront on a picture. On an
_old broken TV. I swear it was
_you staring back at me. I
_thought I saw your reflection
_in a cigarette machine.“
EM NEWS
– Burglar Approved Breakfast
– Gift Birds
– I Always Feel Like Bigfoot is
_Watching Me
– And a whole lot more
MENTALTAINMENT
– Where Would Larry Go?
– Cinema PaulieDiso is right on time
– Schwarzenegger, Trebek, Summers
– The Ticker Flashback
– Birthdays, What We Watched + tons more

ETCETERA
– An all new Top Ten List
– Too Close For Comfort (The EMR Photo Game) (pics on our FB pages)
– A cadre of Odd Tidbits
– Jerry’s Happy Note…In Time
– So much more, your head will spin!