This is Chapter 1 of my upcoming book, "Doofus Dad's Foolproof Guide for Working from Home," which doesn't yet have a release date because I haven't gotten around to writing all the other chapters. In light of our current worldwide conundrum driving millions of folks into home offices, I figured I'd better hurry up and release Chapter 1 so that people would have plenty of skewed and tongue-in-cheek information as soon as possible.