Dan Jurek, Licensed Professional Counselor and Marriage and Family Specialist, joined Discover Lafayette to discuss how the COVID shutdown has impacted individuals, couples, and families. Dan specializes in couples counseling.

Dan has more than 35 years of experience in adult counseling, and marriage and couples counseling, having studied at Franciscan University in Steubenville OH and earning a Masters in Catholic theology. His practice is guided by his Franciscan spirituality, following Christ in the footsteps of St. Francis of Assisi.

He has utilized his experience to help all age groups in our community, having first moved here in 1990 at the urging of St. Thomas More High School's Mike Keith who recruited him to work as Campus Minister. He also worked with Father Hampton Davis with the campus ministry on UL - Lafayette's campus. He received a second master's at Holy Cross in New Orleans and was licensed as a professional counselor in 2003.

Dan started Pax Renewal Center in Lafayette almost two decades ago, as he realized that counseling services were just as vital to a person’s health as exercise and nutrition. Cognizant that some people can't afford to pay for counseling, Pax offers graduate students' services who work under Dan's tutelage, thereby offering counseling at a greatly reduced rate.

The COVID shutdown hit Pax Renewal Center and other area counselors just as it did other sectors. Things slowed down dramatically at first and then picked up again last September. Dan learned quickly that Zoom calls are just not as good as in-person sessions.

"Overwhelm" has been what we have all felt according to Dan, and when you stack stresses on top of each other, "The strongest person can only carry so much weight!" Families were impacted from all angles; the respite that parents had enjoyed when their children were in school or day care evaporated overnight. The fear of COVID, Mom and Dad working from home or looking for work, and the pressing need to buy computer equipment and become IT experts so as to manage online work and school stressed even the healthiest families. For couples who were already strained, who were confined at home together with no where to go, it all amped up energy in an unhealthy way.

"It broke my heart to work with families that experienced abusive situations as it all escalated. Things can quickly move from emotional abuse to physical abuse. Kids who weren't able to attend school, getting that one square meal a day that school provided and having the opportunity to get out of their house to a safe place, their refuge was taken from them. Parents couldn't protect their kids from abuse."

As September 2020 rolled around and the world opened up a bit, couples therapy began anew online. Dan noted while Zoom "works," you had couples who weren't getting along having to sit shoulder to shoulder in an uncomfortable situation. It is also difficult for the therapist to pick up on important body language that is occurring from the chest down that is not visible on a Zoom call, such as shaking legs, clenched fists.

Use of substances rose, as have other addictive behaviors such as over/under eating, process addictions such as overuse of internet and pornography, and of course binge watching of shows on Netflix and other outlets. Rather than dealing with family or problems, people would numb out in front of the computer or television. So the pain remained.

Calling a counselor is one of the most courageous things a person can do. Calling someone and trusting them to help you feel better is typically a result of "inspiration or desperation," according to Dan. But as they present, people are typically honest about the pain they feel and share universal symp...