During the Trump impeachment hearings day one, Ambassador William Taylor revealed new info about another alleged Trump call asking Sondland about the Biden investigations. GOP load Mark Meadows dismissed the new Shitler bombshell during a frantic presser. State Department Ukraine expert George Kent testified to Congress and debunked fraudulent Republican Ukraine conspiracy theories. Reptilian Acting Chief of Staff Mick Mulvaney refuses to testify in front of the House, as Trump aides counsel the orange one to not give Mulvaney the boot. Fourth Reich Barbie (Laura Ingraham) said some ignorant garbage about preserving our racist culture. The ninnies of Fox and Friends worry that if Elizabeth Warren is elected, billionaires may have to sell one of their islands to pay taxes. Sean Hannity poo-poo’d the impeachment witnesses as nerdy dudes in glasses that don’t really know Cheeto, and nailed the fascist landing by warning his listeners not to believe what they see and hear at the hearings.