2020 is getting a lot of appropriate buzz as a year for clearer vision. It remains to be seen if we can leverage it the way we hope. According to U.S. News & World Report, 80% of New Year's resolutions fail by mid-January. Other surveys report that well over 90% of all resolutions fail somewhere along the way as the new year progresses.

Due to the vast distinctions of resolutions, it's tough to determine why they fail, but there likely are some general truths we can consider.

For starters, many of us decide to do something that we've never done before. Well, never successfully. Or to any degree. Even more so, we likely don't alter our behavior. Doing the same things. Remaining in the same habits won't result in a different outcome. And habits are very hard to change.

The old year ended professionally with a focus on disagreement. I had a number of clients who wanted to enter the new year with a focus (for some, a renewed focus) on crafting a culture devoid of blame. "That's not our department's responsibility," isn't something the leaders at the top want to continue to hear. But the blaming game isn't limited to that phrase. Disagreement takes on many forms and faces.

I bring this up right here in the initial episode of The Power Of Others podcast because it demonstrates the point of this podcast so well. This is a podcast about how we benefit from who surrounds us. And yes, that can include those who disagree with us.

Benefit. That word is intentional.

I know we could easily focus on the negative side of the power of others. Bad company corrupts good morals according to the Bible. We've all seen it. Maybe even in our own lives. There's positive power in teaching such lessons to our children and to ourselves. Be careful who your friends are. It's wise advice.

I'm optimistic though. I prefer to lean into the sunlight of what's possible if we just put our minds into active work. Benefits are possible - far more probable - when we put ourselves in the company of people who can help us grow.

The first disagreement that may serve us well is to disagree with ourselves. To question things we've long thought were absolutely true. To seek productive disagreement in our lives. Most of us will do everything in our power to maintain the status quo, even if the status quo isn't working. We tend to hate change. Growth and improvement are often the most powerful forms of change.

It's not about conflict. With yourself or others. It's about learning that not everything is worth fighting. Not because we're apathetic, but because life is more complicated than we first think. We like neat tidy packages of our assumptions and beliefs. But life is messy.

Culture is steeped in an "I'm right, you're wrong" way of communication. It stems from the notion that we all feel completely right. We know, with great certainty, that the other person is wrong. Look inside yourself though and you'll quickly see how complex it all is. You believe what you do for very complicated reasons. Even simple positions are fraught with complex drivers. Why don't we ever assume it's the same for the other side? Because we don't want to make that assumption. It's easy - and makes us feel better - to simply think they're idiots who don't know. They're just wrong. And we're right.

So much of our disagreement stems from the craving to feel better about ourselves. Unfortunately, it's too often at the expense of others. That's not a positive leveraging of the power of others. That's leveraging the power of self-delusion, which never works to help us grow or improve.

I've long used the scenario of a favorite milkshake flavor. What's yours?

Mine is going to be chocolate, sometimes. Vanilla at other times. I'll never pick strawberry. But I love strawberries and I love that flavor.