"The central economic imperative of the network economy is to amplify relationships." That's what Kevin Kelly wrote in New Rules For The New Economy.

Self-awareness is hard. VERY hard.

Schools don't help. I know better than to do what I did, but I did it anyway. Because sometimes I'm a ninnie.

My 12-year-old grandson is in 7th grade. That means he's now in junior high. It's a big transition from elementary school. In many ways. He's got 7 classes.

Yesterday I was asking him about his grades. To be fair, I rarely do this. Mostly I ask him about what he's enjoying (and why). Or I ask what he's done well. I'm usually more focused on encouraging him to lean into those things he's really good at. Part of my problem is the same problem other adults have with the kids in their family. A built-in favorable bias where we may think our kids are pretty good at everything.

He told me he had A's in 4 of the 7 classes, but by the time the report cards hit he expects to have A's in the remaining 3 classes. "But you don't have any C's do you?" I asked. Hello, judgment! ;)

That's what's wrong with the state of education in America. Cookie cutter, single standard grade-based performance does not help our kids figure out what they may be best at. Instead, kids are able to quickly tell you what they're not very good at. We've got it backwards. Our kids should be able to quickly tell us where they're strongest.

This is important for many reasons. Confidence building is chief among them.

A buddy calls me up. He's telling me about a networking event he attended - we both normal shy away from these affairs. He's been studying some techniques to improve behavior by elevating your thoughts. So he tries a quick exercise as he walks into the room. Determined to find one suitable client candidate he surveys the room. One person catches his eye. He's not even sure why, but he approaches the fellow and begins a conversation. This isn't some full-blown sales mode ordeal. They're just talking and learning more about each other. As my buddy answers the question, "What do you do?" the other fellow leans in. He's very interested and asks if they can meet sometime so he can learn more. Well, now you know why my buddy called to tell me this story.

We're both interested in neuroscience, psychology and why people do what they do. Both of us have studied people for decades. And we're both pretty self-aware. Like you, we're very aware of our weaknesses.

"It's confidence," I say. "You employed a technique you believe in. So as you enter that room you believed - you REALLY believed - you'd find a potential client."

My friend's value system - the way he sees the world and his place in it - coupled with his strong belief in this technique designed to help him - it gave him the best opportunity to enter that room and make a connection. That's how it works for all of us. But most of us mistake going it alone. Trying to figure these things out for ourselves. The knowledge we have of ourselves is too frequently conceit and pride. Typically it's because we didn't incorporate others to help us see things more clearly. We neglect to amplify relationships that can help us soar with our strengths.

What's more important than your ability to discover and leverage your individual strengths?

When you amplify relationships you dramatically improve that ability. Because you surround yourself with some people willing and able to help you elevate those abilities.

This isn't a comparison game. It's an insight game. People who surround you - people with whom you have a close and safe relationship - are able to support you, serve you and help you see things you wouldn't otherwise see. In yourself and in the world around you.

On the flip side,