The Soccer Sidelines

The Soccer Sidelines


The Best Tool for Your Parenting Toolbox

February 10, 2020

None of us are perfect parents. The best we can hope for is to be a continually improving parent. It's about effort, right? We do the best we can. We make mistakes. We count on the fact that our kids are resilient enough to overcome our shortfalls, and we try again tomorrow. 

I don't think there is a parent on the planet who didn't wish there was something they could add to their toolbox that would give them a leg up on parenting. In this episode, we'll talk about a tool that is within your reach. Let's talk about it. 

The Development Window
Did you know that our role as parents evolve as our kids grow older? Sure you did! But how are kids different when they parallel play? At what age do we need to start letting go? How hard can we push them at 12-years old? How about at 15-years-old? When does your child's cranium get strong enough to head a ball? What psycho-social issues will they be wrestling with in their Junior year and how do you communicate with kids every year from the time they're 3 until they are 18?

Fifteen years in a child's life from 3-yrs-old to 18-yrs-old is commonly referred to as "the development window" when it comes to youth sports. It may be the time in our kids lives when we, as parents, have the greatest impact on our kids. What they learn and how they learn it during these years points them in hopefully a healthy direction. What they learn during these critical years will become a foundation on which they build the rest of their adult lives. 

As critical as these years are for our kids, they are also the years that we, as parents, learn to be parents. I was the oldest child in my family. My mother gave birth to me when she was 20 years old. The differences in her parenting style from when I was born until when my sister was born 7 years later is remarkable. As parents, we often cut our teeth on our first born kids and figure out the parenting thing - at least to some degree - by the time our youngest leaves home. As parents, we're developing alongside our kids. 
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A Parenting Head Start
We're made into parents through very little effort or training. There is no license we need, or even a book to read that bestows on us the title of parent. Wisdom is earned through a series of mistakes, trial and error. By the time we figure it out, our kids are out of the house. 

What if there was a series of courses that would teach you how to communicate better with kids? To keep them moving when they're bored. To manage the trials of each age group physically, mentally, and psychosocially? 

What if there was a practice area where you could refine the skills you were taught in class? What if you had a bunch of kids in the same age group as your own kids that you could work with to refine your skills. 

Youth coaching education is not limited to understanding the game of soccer. In fact, the majority of content that gets taught as the fundamental levels is about stuff you can use at home, on the field, or in the office. Communication, conflict resolution, what's appropriate at each age physically, mentally, emotionally, and psychosocially. It's about injury prevention, appropriate levels of activity, and about injury management. Who among the parent population wouldn't benefit from a little injury prevention and management? 

Remarkably, earning my coaching credentials have had a tremendous positive impact on my ability to parent. I've learned to anticipate and respond to my kids needs. I've been okay with letting go. I've been able to set boundaries, be clear about those boundaries, and give my kids the freedom (and responsibility) to becom...