The Virtual Couch

The Virtual Couch


Rewiring Emotions: From Humor to Honesty in Therapy

January 15, 2024

Tony takes inspiration from Carolyn Steber's article, "Is Everyone Out Here Lying To Their Therapist," https://www.bustle.com/wellness/lying-to-therapist using it as a muse (and explaining what a muse is) to explore the benefits and challenges of therapy from both the client's and therapist's viewpoints. He delves into primary and secondary emotions, highlighting how humor and anger often serve as secondary emotions. Tony also unpacks the origin of the "what's wrong with me" mindset, explaining how children internalize emotions, leading to a reliance on external validation in adulthood. The episode concludes with insightful discussions on neuroplasticity, implicit memory, and the significant benefits of being honest with your therapist.


00:00 Introduction and Welcome

00:41 Engaging with the Audience: Social Media and Live Q&A

01:58 The Power of Muse and Self-Reflection

03:45 Exploring the Article: Is Everyone Lying to Their Therapist?

04:07 Understanding the Role of a Therapist

06:12 The Science Behind Talk Therapy

14:18 The Role of Humor in Therapy

17:47 Understanding Primary and Secondary Emotions

24:32 Understanding Secondary Emotions

24:52 Exploring Anger and Humor as Secondary Emotions

25:31 The Role of Childhood Experiences in Shaping Emotions

26:38 The Impact of Humor as a Coping Mechanism

28:27 The Power of Neuroplasticity and Implicit Memory

29:23 The Influence of Environment on Emotional Tendencies

30:04 The Role of Humor in Therapy Sessions

30:31 The Importance of Honesty in Therapy

32:02 Understanding the Role of Validation in Therapy

37:54 The Power of Neuroplasticity in Changing Emotional Responses

39:57 The Role of Therapists and Coaches in Emotional Growth

40:08 Understanding the Importance of Comfort and Trust in Therapy

44:04 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Growth


To learn more about Tony's upcoming re-release of the Magnetic Marriage course, his Pathback Recovery course, and more, sign up for his newsletter through the link at https://linktr.ee/virtualcouch


Please follow Tony’s newest Instagram account for the Waking Up to Narcissism podcast https://www.instagram.com/wutnpod/ as well as Tony’s account https://www.instagram.com/tonyoverbay_lmft/ 


Subscribe to Tony's latest podcast, "Waking Up to Narcissism Q&A - Premium Podcast," on the Apple Podcast App. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/waking-up-to-narcissism-q-a/id1667287384


Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony's "Magnetize Your Marriage" virtual workshop. The cost is only $19, and you'll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. 


You can learn more about Tony's pornography recovery program, The Path Back, by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit 


Tony mentioned a product that he used to take out all of the "uh's" and "um's" that, in his words, "must be created by wizards and magic!" because it's that good! To learn more about Descript, click here https://descript.com?lmref=bSWcEQ