Episode 9: Emotional Intelligence 101

Guest: Ush Dhanek

Ush always knew that something was missing and that there was something else she was meant to do besides working in her corporate career as a lawyer and then as Head of Human Resources. She didn’t know what that “something else” was until she came across Emotional Intelligence. As she studied this for herself, she also realized that some of the most successful people around her, and some of the people that she interacted with early on in her career had this missing X-Factor. Curiosity got the better of Ush and she not only studied this further, but she became a certified Emotional Intelligence Coach. Since then, Ush has worked with companies and individuals across the globe and is a sought after coach in the field of Emotional Intelligence.
Wanting to take the world of EQ even further, Ush became certified as a Proctor Gallagher consultant, being mentored by Bob Proctor. Since then, Ush has an even better understanding of how the mind works. Answers to questions such as how to we bridge the gap between knowing and doing, how to effectively overcome self sabotage and how to become an influential leader in the workplace.
Ush’s qualifications and certifications in Executive Coaching, Emotional Intelligence Coaching, Neuro Leadership and Mediation is complimented by working in the field. Ush has worked with a variety of corporate clients ranging from the Australia Federal Police, Smeg Australia, all the way to hospitality and dental. Ush is also on the Board of Directors for Hunterlink, an employee wellbeing service. Having worked for clients across the globe from Australia, Shanghai, Canada and London, Ush’s experience will be second to none whether you are looking for corporate training or individual coaching.

“If we are in frustration mode. Kids don’t stop loving you, but they can stop loving themselves.”
– Ush Dhanek

Some topics that were discussed include:
• When we get frustrated (and we all do) with our kids, how do we manage the emotions?
• We often bring the stresses of life home.
• EQ is Emotional Quotient which is the measure of Emotional Intelligence.
• EQ is a learned behavior. It is something anyone can learn.
• It is the ability to manage emotions and using that information that is gained to ultimately manage the situation around you.

• It all starts with self awareness. If we aren’t aware of what we are feeling we won’t be able to help our children effectively.
• There are triggers that have to do with our paradigms and our upbringing. 9.35
• Children need a foundation. A clear starting point. We must accept that our children aren’t going to be like us. They are unique.
• Am I (as a parent) getting frustrated more than not? Notice when it is happening. Are you spending enough time together?
• There are 15-20 questions you can ask what are the 3 things you messed up on today? These types of questions make you dig deeper, accept failure? Are we saying it’s okay to fail?
• Ask the child, when was the last thing I did to make you feel love, to make you feel unloved?
• Understand why your child feels the way they feel.
• Get behind the reasons your child has an emotion. There are five categories. This gives you an avenue of understanding.
• We all operate by a system of rules. Learn to focus on why the rules are in place and what is the expected outcome?
• The Size of the problem. Learn to talk about and rate how big a problem really is. Work through a solution by modeling behavior. Ush gives a great example. Ie/ this is quite a big problem. We should work together to fix this. Is it a leaf problem, branch problem, trunk problem or root problem.
Contact Ush Dhanek:
Ush Dhanak
Emotional Intelligence Expert
www.ushdhanak.com