FFFTTT! That's the sound of the Lovers swiping right on Miz Marcia Belsky, stand-up, writer and misandrist extraordinaire!

Marcia gives Pepsi zero stars, Murf gets a clean bill of health on his scoliosis exam and Diana makes love to a G train; meanwhile, Hoz jerks off to Trump's infamous Access Hollywood recording.

Hit up marciabelsky.com, follow @MarciaBelsky and listen to her "radical" feminist band, Free the Mind.