🌀While ‘birth’ and ‘death’ may feel very distant from one another, they are in fact so close together that life would not occur without them. As a birth keeper myself, I am completely compelled to learn more about death, and the more I connect the richer the tapestry of my life becomes. I start to weave life with a brighter thread. I become aware and open and increasingly more accepting of the death path. So, when I connected with Amy from Little Silk Wings, I felt so connected to the work she was and is doing. Amy is supporting Doula’s to support death, and in turn reaching out to the wider community to bring birth and death back into awareness. This work is imperative for the processing of grief; its important that we talk about death because, like birth, death is a right of passage. Death is becoming one of my favourite subjects and I just loved this story with Amy. In this story, we speak closely about Amy’s own experience, with her son being very close to the death path, and how Amy navigated this experience. 🌿
I am not going to apply any trigger warnings here because this story shares the gifts and the potions of how we can come together and support the death path. Please share this and check out the event Let Me See My Baby in the resources below. 
So, we begin the journey with Amy heading into her three birth stories. Amy describes her first pregnancy as being the entry into the world of birth and advocacy for women. The pregnancies, as Amy describes, were rather straight forward and from in between the first and second pregnancy, Little Silk Wings was born.

Amy talks about her doula journey and supporting families for the best outcome possible. During the unfolding of her journey, Amy found a lack of understanding and support for when baby is unwell; it’s not the issue of people not wanting to support the mother and family, it’s simply the lack of understanding on how to provide support. Amy trained with Still Birthday in Canada and then, indirectly, came into a support role for doula’s called into bereavement.

Amy in her first birth with her doula.
We then talk about her third birth, when Amy would have liked to give birth at home but homebirth was unaffordable. Amy and her doula jokingly talked about a freebirth on the road, and what happened? A freebirth on the side of the road! Amy talks about the whole event and the quick birth that just did not quite make it to the hospital. Everyone felt calm and OK about the situation, an ambulance was called and Amy was in hospital for a few hours then back home again. Amy describes that she never could visualise her birth in a hospital.
 

From here the journey took a change of direction. Amy describes heading home and having a beautiful dinner and then sleep. The next day Amy started to feel that something was ‘not right’ with her son, Gabriel. She found him to be limp and just not quite right and, having been there twice before with her daughters, knew that something was different. On day 3 Gabriel started to vomit a little, the colour seemed not quite right and Amy says she was advised to try to be positive. An ambulance was called and then they left not long after saying, “He is fine.” Amy was still concerned and took him straight to hospital and her concerns were right; little Gabriel had mal-rotation of the bowel.

Recovery after the surgery – Amy describes – “His face was swollen and he had a machine breathing for him. He had cords coming out of him in numerous places and had a big, red slice across his tummy. They had put his little white beanie back on, I was thankful for that.”

The surgery process was massive: Amy describes being left in the surgery waiting area covered in newborn vomit and completely tired,