Some vampire movies are thoughtful, compelling, and faithful adaptations. Others have Hugh Jackman with really luscious hair. And do we really have a problem with that?

So join us for a monster mash of a fun afternoon, as we discuss who knows what kind of movie they are in (hint: not Hugh Jackman), a paternal Dracula, and a rebooted Universal Monsters expanded universe. On the side that requires more brain power, it's women being denied starring in their own story, use of a word that shouldn't be used

Bonus feature! We complain about how every movie is part of a franchise or expanded universe now. We complain a lot.

Warnings:
Vampire-typical violence
Mention of the film using an offensive word
References to miscarriage and child death.