Welcome back to Tuff Love with Rob Kandell. This show is in response to the #metoo meme that has had people all over the world talking about the pervasive issue of sexual assault and harassment. Rob believes the truth is the most important impact we can have in this world, and if we’re not willing to speak up then that impact can remain hidden. You never know who you can help just by telling your truth. The #metoo meme has seen hundreds of thousands of people tell the truth about their experiences. It would be naïve to say it happens only to women, though predominantly it happens exceptionally more to women than men.

An interesting statistic Rob found on the Telegraph was that there were 1 million tweets in 3 days with the hashtag #metoo. Those 1 million tweets were interacted (clicked on or re-tweeted) 3.6 billion times. The estimate is that over 5 billion people saw the tweets.

Of the people tweeting 31.1% were men, and 69.9% were female. Now a lot of men were tweeting their support for the #metoo campaign, so it’s not saying that 31.1% of men were harassed. It’s unknown what the exact statistic is. However, the topic of men being harassed is for a different show.

This show is about the effect of sexual harassment that is entwined in our society. Women being harassed on a daily basis is part of the social DNA in our society. It’s so entwined that it’s not even perceived as unusual today. It’s happening right now. Rob’s goal is to bring the conversation out more and more.

However, Rob doesn’t want to rehash what’s already been said. He’s here to engage in many voices out there, rather than report on the news. There are 7 women and 1 man who put up their hand to come on the show and participate in this discussion today. It takes a lot of bravery on all accounts.

Rob did some research before today’s show and here’s what he found:

The #metoo movement was actually started in 2006 by a women’s activist named Tarana Burke. The recent meme was started by movie and TV star Alyssa Milano.
Tarana, the starter of #metoo, was worried about her work being undone by all the sharing that’s going on in social media. It wasn’t about victims necessarily talking about it, it was about educating men about the effects so they would do something about it.
So #metoo is really a wakeup call to men to say, ‘You’re doing this. You might not even be aware that you’re doing this, but this is happening. Wake up.’
Men in positions of power often have the position of abuse. This is what happens when you get a point of power. It can be a power over. We are not conscious with our power.
This affects Rob so much because he was in that position of power for 10 years. While his specific abuse patterns were not to invade women’s boundaries, he did let a lot of other people in positions of power abuse others.
Being in that position of power and not doing anything has deeply affected Rob, years and years later. The lesson he’s learning is the importance of speaking up.
The crime of silence is how evil pervades. A lot of the articles Rob has been reading are really from men calling on men to call out other men to notice this happening. That is the most powerful way to stop this.
Rob doesn’t think this conversation will stop sexual harassment and abuse from happening because it’s so ingrained in the fabric of our society. But he does hope this conversation could help other men to say, ‘Bro, don’t do that.’ That’s the message that needs to happen.
Rob wants to let women know that the greatest way he learned to be a man was by women educating him. His enlightenment happened when women told him the truth. He would still be numb and dumb if it weren’t for that.
Rob did a post that women are the best educators of men, and several women responded saying they’re so tired,