"Despotic leaders litter human history. It’s mostly what we have - is people being dickbags in office."

"I started to watch it but then I urinated sweat from all of my pores and I had to go change."

"Do black people white knuckle?"

"I’m going to have my stomach stapled and collated. I need to have my diet organized."

"Your beauty’s gonna get hella faded bro"

"A baseball DiCaprio"