On this episode of the By His Grace podcast, I sit down with New York Times Best-selling author Karen Ehman to discuss people-pleasing. You ask yourself how can I stop pleasing others. Karen shares her life-long addiction and struggles with being a people pleaser. In her pursuit of wanting God, she struggled with pleasing other people. Which led to her summer of no. With honesty and practical wisdom, Karen explores why we fall into people-pleasing behaviors and offers advice for how we can break out into the freedom God has called us to. Because the truth is we cannot fulfill our divine purpose if we’re too busy living everyone else’s.
Karen is the author of When Making Others Happy is Making You Miserable: How to Break the Habit of People Pleasing and Confidently Live Your Life. Author and speaker Karen Ehman knows firsthand how people-pleasing locks us in a prison, traps us in unhealthy habits which distract us from our God-given purpose.
Key Takeaways
People-pleasing is a strength that is carried to an extreme
When we choose people over God, then we are putting people in the place of God, and let them call the shots instead of him
I underestimated my ability to take on a lot of things and I just kept saying yes to everything
The summer of necessary & no, doing only what was necessary for home and ministry
It was the hardest and best thing I’ve ever done
Put back on my plate only the things I knew God was calling me to, not the other things I was expected to do
Sometimes we feel like there’s so much to do, and we want to have our fingers in all of it
Write out everything you have to do, and what are the things that only you can do, what can I delegate or pay someone to do
Be firm in our no, and don’t over-explain
Scape your plate, and be prayerful about what you add back on
Resources
Karen’s website
When Making Others Happy is Making You Miserable: How to Break the Habit of People Pleasing and Confidently Live Your Life
“For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10 (ESV)
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